Hey there y’all! Happy New Year! I hope 2023 brings to you all that you work hard to accomplish! January is always a long month for me…not sure if it is the weather, the number of weeks that always seem to fall in this month, or what, but this year I am set on making January a STRONG start to my journey in all areas of my life! And, my finances is one of the first things I want to work on!
I am already back on track with my health goals and have plans for getting my business generating paid clients (more on that soon), but I feel that I certainly have always been on this financial roller coaster throughout my entire life. Growing up in a very simple home, I learned early to bargain shop (even when it came to necessities like groceries) and how to stretch a dollar. My grandparents were very set on saving all they had, so they lived very simple lives…my parents were young and it took them time while I was growing up to get to a point of making a living that could actually take care of our basic responsibilities. And, I guess I was no different, as I had to take out student loans and work two jobs to get through college (my ex-husband did as well), use credit cards to pay for professional work attire (in addition to fun, spending money), and really plan out how I was going to feed my family AND afford gas to get to and from work with the little money we had left once we paid our bills as young parents. As you can see…these were years that money was more of a financial burden for me than anything close to thinking I was on my way to financial freedom!
As I continued in my career and started to make more money, it seemed that I just couldn’t catch a break. Those were the years that my ex started to have difficulty keeping jobs…or at least jobs that paid enough to keep us financially stable. Once he did get to that point with a more solid work situation, that is when the spending started. At one point, we even made the decision to separate our money into two separate bank accounts and divide out the financial responsibilities of our home and life. Funny thing, since I made more, he made the decision that I should contribute more…and he ended up having a whole lot more financial freedom, so to speak, than I did…as I ended up being the responsible party in our relationship when it came to taking care of our home.
Once I became a single woman, I had to learn how to take care of my entire life, and my daughter (who was not a child at the time, but still in college and still working to find her own way in life). I also was learning how to be single, so I will be the first to admit, I did not do well with making any kind of decisions…financial or otherwise. And, again, I found myself right back to where I was years prior. The difference was, I was making a 6 figure salary at this point, but really nothing to show for it. Feeling ashamed and confused on how I let this happen, it put me into a bigger spiral and farther into financial woes.
One day, however, I finally woke up and said that this was more than enough! If nothing changes, nothing changes…and it was definitely time for change. It wasn’t until this time in my life I got serious about my money…well, as serious as far as I knew, anyway! I decided I was going to start paying down debt, saving money, and start living like a responsible adult. It wasn’t until this time that I actually realized that all of my financial history was ultimately my responsibility…yes, others made decisions that caused me to lack financial means, but I didn’t do anything to stop it, anything to protect myself. Thinking back now, I think I even really thought, eventually it will fix itself. And clearly, not even partly true!
Once I was at a point of being in a good spot, there was still a stigma around being a single woman. If you read my blog back in 2021 when I purchased my home (An Unmarried Woman), you would have hear about how important it was that the loan company specifically noted that in my documents at closing…which I am still baffled about! And, even though I was able to build a house, purchase cars with 0% interest, I still wasn’t using my finances to the best of their abilities. Someone making 6 figures should have back up plans for emergencies, should have 2 months salary saved just in case, and should have some kind of set retirement so that they can live comfortably after giving so much of their life to working on their career. I am very sad to say, I am not there…and really wonder if I know how to be.
You see…growing up in a lack type of environment, I learned that when you did have extra, you spend it…as you may not have this extra ever again…and then you can not have the things in life you dream of wanting. When you have a scarcity mindset when it comes to money, you believe…no, maybe you know…that there is only so much afforded to you and when it is gone it is gone…so you better get what you want/need while you have it. Kind of like, that money is burning a hole in your pocket…yes, a phrase I have heard many times in my life. But, when you have an abundance mindset, you believe that you can generate more money…which in turn allows you to build a positive relationship with your money, knowing it will work for you because you know how to make it work for you. I have never known a time in my life when I have not worried about money, having enough, keeping it, how to save it appropriately, and how to spend wisely. I am a smart girl, but this just has not been a strength for me! But…this changes in 2023!
This year, I plan to learn all I can about saving, investing, and setting myself up for financial freedom in my future. I plan to face my money fears, work to change my mindset, and believe that I am someone who is worth not only making money, but using it in a way that it can one day take care of me. I am making adjustments in my life, I am researching and learning all I can, I am working on my thoughts and that inner voice that talks to me on the daily! And, I am bringing new people in my world to help me…yes, as a type A, we are hesitant to ask for help…and yes, I know…that makes us stubborn or just plan dumb! 😊 I am committed to making this half of my life, my best half of my life…and in doing so, I am looking to learn all I can and have the financial freedom to live life to it’s fullest.
I am excited to take you on this journey with me, as I know as women, we do get referred to as “the single woman” buying the house, or worse yet, stuck in situations that if we are forced to take care of ourselves in life, take care of our children without the support of a significant other, we can do it! My mission is to help 5,000 women be able to build a life they love to wake up to each and every day, and with the knowledge and skills I learn and share with you, I feel this will definitely put me on that path! So stick with me on this road ahead! Until next time! Cheri ❤️
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